{"id":99484,"date":"2022-09-14T15:36:21","date_gmt":"2022-09-14T15:36:21","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/websitedesigns.com.au\/elankanew\/?p=99484"},"modified":"2022-09-14T15:36:21","modified_gmt":"2022-09-14T15:36:21","slug":"noel-news-35","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/websitedesigns.com.au\/elankanew\/noel-news-35\/","title":{"rendered":"Noel News"},"content":{"rendered":"<h2 style=\"text-align: center;\"><span style=\"font-size: 24px; color: #000000;\">Noel News\u00a0<\/span><\/h2>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-99485\" src=\"https:\/\/websitedesigns.com.au\/elankanew\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/Noel-News-1-e1663095114358.jpg\" alt=\"Noel News\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" \/><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16px;\"><em>Thousands of candles can be lighted from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened. Happiness never decreases by being shared.<\/em><\/span><br \/>\n<span style=\"font-size: 16px;\">BUDDHA<\/span><\/p>\n<p><strong><span style=\"font-size: 20px;\">Welcome to another newsletter<\/span><\/strong><u><\/u><u><\/u><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">I started the last newsletter discussing interest rates and the rise of 50 basis points last Tuesday, taking the cash rate to 2.35%, confirms my opinion that rates are moving upwards. The Reserve Bank wants to get rates at a level which it regards as normal and will keep increasing rates by 50 basis points every month until that target is reached.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">Many economists think that 3.35% will be that target but I reckon it\u2019s nearer 4%. So much will depend on inflation, but when you consider that petrol prices will rise this month as the government subsidies are removed, and life in Europe can only get worse as winter draws near, it\u2019s hard to see any quick improvements.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-99486\" src=\"https:\/\/websitedesigns.com.au\/elankanew\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/Noel-News-2-e1663095268199.png\" alt=\"Noel News 2\" width=\"600\" height=\"231\" \/><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">Everybody I speak to is crying out for staff, and a builder friend tells me that timber prices will rise dramatically next year because so many trees that would\u2019ve been felled have destroyed by bushfires. I guess it\u2019s a case of watch this space.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><strong><span style=\"font-size: 20px;\">Pensions up!!<\/span><\/strong><u><\/u><u><\/u><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">There\u2019s good news for pensioners this month with the biggest increase in pension payments for many years starting on 20 September.<\/span><u><\/u><u><\/u><\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-99487\" src=\"https:\/\/websitedesigns.com.au\/elankanew\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/Noel-News-3-Pensions-up-e1663095384708.jpg\" alt=\"Noel News 3-Pensions up\" width=\"600\" height=\"460\" \/><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16px;\">Thanks to the good people at My Pension Manager the new rate charts are already available on my website for download, and the pension calculator on the website has been updated with the new rates.<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16px;\">Feel free to go to the Age Pension Calculator on my website and work out for yourself how much more pension you may be entitled to. Note there\u2019s been a slight increase in the cut off points for the assets test due to the pension increases. For example, the cut-off point for a homeowner couple has gone from $915,500 to $935,000. For a single the numbers have risen from $609,250 to $622,250.<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16px;\">Just keep in mind that this is not some extraordinary largess from the government of the day \u2013 it\u2019s simply the normal six-monthly indexation adjustment to the rate of the pension due to inflation. Just spare a thought for the renters \u2013 the increase in rent assistance is minimal compared to what they are facing in the real world.<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16px;\">During the job summit the ABC rang me to comment on a media release they had received from the Federal Government stating pensioners could now earn $4000 more a year without losing any pension. It\u2019s received no publicity, but remember that income test changes only affect income tested pensioners &#8211; they don\u2019t affect asset tested pensioners. A pensioner can now earn $150 a week from business or personal exertion, so these new rules if legislated, will take that to around $230 a week. It would be a great income boost for an income tested pensioner, and could help our huge job shortage.<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16px;\">If you\u2019re at the high end of the asset range but still getting a part pension, take advice about the new lifetime income streams whereby only 60% of whats you invest is counted for the assets test. The combination of the increased age pension, and the income from these new products, can significantly boost retirees\u2019 income. To find out know more talk to you advisor or read the appropriate chapter in my book Retirement Made Simple.<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong><span style=\"font-size: 20px; color: #000000;\">Next month\u2019s Federal Budget<\/span><\/strong><u><\/u><u><\/u><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">The Federal Budget will be delivered on Tuesday 25 October, which just happens to be the day that we are due to arrive home from Los Angeles. Treasurer Jim Chalmers has already announced that everybody will be expected to make \u201csacrifices\u201d but we will need to wait till next month to find out what those sacrifices might be.<\/span><br \/>\n<span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">\u00a0<\/span><br \/>\n<span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">A hot tip is that there will be changes to superannuation, and we are already being softened up by a barrage of articles in the press claiming that the superannuation system is flawed, because people are dying with not all their superannuation spent. The reality is that older people are scared of the high cost of aged care, and want to make sure they keep plenty of cash in their super lest they live longer than their money. That\u2019s just prudence.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-99550\" src=\"https:\/\/websitedesigns.com.au\/elankanew\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/Noel-News-4.png\" alt=\"Noel News \" width=\"273\" height=\"945\" \/><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">Of course, the inference is that we are allowed to have too much in our superannuation accounts. There has also been much publicity about some self-managed funds which have very large assets, even over $100 million, but these are restricted to a very few people, and were created through exceptional circumstances. For example, a person may have started a business many years ago, put the business premises and company shares into their superannuation fund, and over the years built a huge thriving business. But these are legacy issues \u2013 the members are mostly old, and the maximum anybody can bequeath to their family inside the superannuation system is around $1.7 million. The rest can be paid only to their beneficiaries personally. In no more than 15 years all the big balances will be no more.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-99551\" src=\"https:\/\/websitedesigns.com.au\/elankanew\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/Noel-News-5.png\" alt=\"Noel News \" width=\"360\" height=\"215\" \/><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">As the rules stand today you must draw a set amount from your pension fund every year based on its balance at the previous 30 June, but there is no requirement to withdraw from your accumulation fund. There is one suggestion that once you reach a certain age, you will be required to draw a set percentage of all your superannuation, not just the pension account. Another suggestion is that the accumulation account will be taxed at 30% per annum instead of its present 15% per annum. This is because 30% is the company tax rate \u2013 if they made the rate any higher people would simply withdraw their money from superannuation and hold it in a company. Another view is that any balances over $5 million will be disallowed and people will be required to draw sufficient money from their superannuation to get the balance down to below $5 million.<\/span><br \/>\n<span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">\u00a0<\/span><br \/>\n<span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">And let us never forget that superannuation itself provides one of the greatest benefits this country has ever had. For the year ending June 2021 superannuation funds paid out a total of $128 billion of which $68 billion represented lump sum payments and $60 billion were pension payments. The large amount of money paid out as lump sum payments was mainly because many people are suspicious of super and cash in their superannuation and put the money in the bank as soon as they retire. There are others who have a mortgage and withdraw their super as a lump sum so they can retire mortgage free. The savings to future welfare bills are incalculable.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">In contrast the amount paid in age pensions in the same period was $52.7 billion. That\u2019s far less than the half paid out by super funds. It\u2019s notable that there is a long-term trend of gradual reduction in the proportion of\u00a0 Australians receiving the age pension. This is due a range of factors but one of the main ones is that today\u2019s retirees have more assets at retirement because of the maturation of our superannuation system.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">It is clear that the superannuation system is providing the benefits it was decided to do. It\u2019s time to leave the system alone.<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong><span style=\"font-size: 20px;\">Building wealth and saving tax<\/span><\/strong><u><\/u><u><\/u><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16px;\">People are always asking about the best way to pay less tax. The obvious answer is to combine an investment in growth assets with earning the types of income that receive tax concessions.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-99552\" src=\"https:\/\/websitedesigns.com.au\/elankanew\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/Building-wealth-and-saving-tax-e1663166495764.jpg\" alt=\"Building wealth and saving tax\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Think about it: capital gains tax is the best type of tax to pay, because is not triggered until you dispose of the asset, and, provided you\u2019ve held that asset for over a year, you get a 50% discount on your normal tax rate. Furthermore, death does not trigger CGT. It simply transfers your liability to the beneficiaries, who will also not pay any CGT until they dispose of the asset.<\/p>\n<p>The best type of concessionally taxed income is franking credits from dividends from Australian shares. In the bad old days, dividends suffered double taxation. First the companies paid tax on any profits they made, then shareholders were taxed at their marginal rate when they received the tax-paid profits as dividends.<\/p>\n<p>Fortunately, since 1 July 1987, dividends from companies that have paid Australian company tax carry imputation credits. This allows shareholders to receive credit for the tax paid by any company in which they hold shares, so that they pay tax only on the difference between the company tax already paid and their own tax rate. Dividends that carry imputation credits are called \u201cfranked dividends.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Suppose a company made $1,000,000 profit, paid tax of $300,000, and distributed the after-tax profit of $700,000 in dividends to its shareholders. The $300,000 of tax paid entitles the shareholders to $300,000 in imputation credits. So if you had $140,000 worth of shares in that company, and it paid it you a dividend of $7000, it would include $3000 of franking credits.<\/p>\n<p>Those credits are as good as cash, which means you have to pay tax on them. Yes, even though you received only $7000, you must declare $10,000 ($7000 + $3000) as taxable income. That\u2019s the bad part \u2013 now comes the good bit. You also declare $3000 of tax deductions for your franking credits \u2013 they offset your tax bill and may reduce it. And if you have more franking credits than you owe in tax, the balance will be refunded to you.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong><span style=\"font-size: 20px;\">CASE STUDY<\/span><\/strong><u><\/u><u><\/u><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16px;\">Jack and Jill are a couple, each earning around $100,000 a year. Because they are in their late 30s they are choosing to save outside the superannuation system, for fear of lack of access and changes in the rules. They invest $200,000 of their savings into an Australian Index Fund. The All Ordinaries Index has averaged 9% (income and growth combined) for the last 100 years, so for this exercise I will assume that for the next year the fund achieved growth of 5%, and paid income of 4%, fully franked.<\/span><br \/>\n<span style=\"font-size: 16px;\">\u00a0<\/span><br \/>\n<span style=\"font-size: 16px;\">Because they understand the importance of putting compound interest to work for them, Jack and Jill reinvest all the income. Therefore, after a year their fund should be worth $218,000, made up of $10,000 in growth and $8,000 in reinvested income. That means at the end of the year the capital value has increased by $18,000.<\/span><br \/>\n<span style=\"font-size: 16px;\">\u00a0<\/span><br \/>\n<span style=\"font-size: 16px;\">Now let\u2019s think about the tax consequences. They intend to keep adding to this fund over the long term, therefore there is no tax each year on the growth because no assets are being cashed in. The dividend of $8000 will carry franking credits of $3430, which means their taxable income will increase to $11,430, made up of $8000 income plus $3430 in franking credits. At their marginal rate of 34.5% (including Medicare) the tax on this will be $3943, but because the franking credits can be used to reduce that, the total tax they will pay on that income is just $513.<\/span><br \/>\n<span style=\"font-size: 16px;\">\u00a0<\/span><br \/>\n<span style=\"font-size: 16px;\">If we put that all together, we can see that the tax on an investment of $200,000 for two people earning $100,000 each, and which produced a total return of $18,000 for the year, was just $513. How much better can it get?!<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong><span style=\"font-size: 20px; color: #000000;\">Travel insurance for older folk<\/span><\/strong><u><\/u><u><\/u><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">I\u2019m 82 years of age and it\u2019s almost impossible to get travel insurance for anybody over 80. It\u2019s particularly important to us because we are leaving on 3 October for our trip to America to see our son James, and want some sort of protection in case of some catastrophe occurs which could cost hundreds of thousands of dollars in medical costs.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-99557\" src=\"https:\/\/websitedesigns.com.au\/elankanew\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/Travel-insurance-for-older-folk-e1663168994195.jpg\" alt=\"Travel insurance for older folk\" width=\"600\" height=\"429\" \/><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16px;\">The good news is that National Seniors have great travel insurance and through them I got a fully comprehensive policy for $1449 after deduction of the 10% discount one gets for being a National Seniors member. My wife Geraldine is fine because she is under 70 and we rely on her Virgin Visa Card which includes travel insurance for under 80\u2019s if you book the tickets on that card.<\/span><\/p>\n<div>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong><span style=\"font-size: 20px; color: #000000;\">James latest podcast<\/span><\/strong><u><\/u><u><\/u><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">Ready to upgrade your relationship?<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"font-weight: 400; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">You\u2019ve almost certainly heard of the book Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus, written by Dr John Gray. It was the best-selling hardcover book of the 1990s and is regarded as the most well-known and trusted relationship book of all time.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">Dr Gray\u2019s books have sold more than 50 million copies and been translated into dozens of languages.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">What I find most interesting about his work is how he explains the distinct biological differences between men and women so we can better understand a) Ourselves \u2013 and how our actions affect those we live with, and b) What our spouse needs so we can keep the marriage strong, happy, and productive.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">Recently, my son James interviewed Dr Gray for his Win the Day podcast. It\u2019s a\u00a0<a style=\"color: #000000;\" href=\"https:\/\/noelwhittaker.us7.list-manage.com\/track\/click?u=da9eb27efd0124961082a497a&amp;id=a94a5a1d58&amp;e=d75f854b0e\" data-saferedirecturl=\"https:\/\/www.google.com\/url?q=https:\/\/noelwhittaker.us7.list-manage.com\/track\/click?u%3Dda9eb27efd0124961082a497a%26id%3Da94a5a1d58%26e%3Dd75f854b0e&amp;source=gmail&amp;ust=1663252422475000&amp;usg=AOvVaw31yD34PThath83qWI9wNWH\">fascinating conversation<\/a>\u00a0and I highly recommend you listen if you\u2019re interested in strengthening your relationship or igniting that spark once more. Dr Gray also shares the biggest mistakes people make as they get older.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\"><a style=\"color: #000000;\" href=\"https:\/\/noelwhittaker.us7.list-manage.com\/track\/click?u=da9eb27efd0124961082a497a&amp;id=5b7fc2a324&amp;e=d75f854b0e\" data-saferedirecturl=\"https:\/\/www.google.com\/url?q=https:\/\/noelwhittaker.us7.list-manage.com\/track\/click?u%3Dda9eb27efd0124961082a497a%26id%3D5b7fc2a324%26e%3Dd75f854b0e&amp;source=gmail&amp;ust=1663252422475000&amp;usg=AOvVaw0W7bW7zPwE6gSLRBpyFCCQ\">YouTube (video)<\/a><\/span><br \/>\n<span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\"><a style=\"color: #000000;\" href=\"https:\/\/noelwhittaker.us7.list-manage.com\/track\/click?u=da9eb27efd0124961082a497a&amp;id=873ca18598&amp;e=d75f854b0e\" data-saferedirecturl=\"https:\/\/www.google.com\/url?q=https:\/\/noelwhittaker.us7.list-manage.com\/track\/click?u%3Dda9eb27efd0124961082a497a%26id%3D873ca18598%26e%3Dd75f854b0e&amp;source=gmail&amp;ust=1663252422475000&amp;usg=AOvVaw3NhyzTdI8cm_OryLP8F-EE\">Apple Podcasts (audio)<\/a><\/span><br \/>\n<span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\"><a style=\"color: #000000;\" href=\"https:\/\/noelwhittaker.us7.list-manage.com\/track\/click?u=da9eb27efd0124961082a497a&amp;id=1d4f73bde8&amp;e=d75f854b0e\" data-saferedirecturl=\"https:\/\/www.google.com\/url?q=https:\/\/noelwhittaker.us7.list-manage.com\/track\/click?u%3Dda9eb27efd0124961082a497a%26id%3D1d4f73bde8%26e%3Dd75f854b0e&amp;source=gmail&amp;ust=1663252422475000&amp;usg=AOvVaw2LH11WdHVDVD0Wsd_ztjpC\">Spotify (audio)<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-99558\" src=\"https:\/\/websitedesigns.com.au\/elankanew\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/Gray-1024x575.png\" alt=\"Gray\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" \/><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">If you watch it on YouTube, you can\u00a0<a style=\"color: #000000;\" href=\"https:\/\/noelwhittaker.us7.list-manage.com\/track\/click?u=da9eb27efd0124961082a497a&amp;id=63226d4b47&amp;e=d75f854b0e\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" data-saferedirecturl=\"https:\/\/www.google.com\/url?q=https:\/\/noelwhittaker.us7.list-manage.com\/track\/click?u%3Dda9eb27efd0124961082a497a%26id%3D63226d4b47%26e%3Dd75f854b0e&amp;source=gmail&amp;ust=1663252422475000&amp;usg=AOvVaw16iLPiYusEVFLHgA4_dLEZ\">leave a comment<\/a>\u00a0so James and \/ or Dr Gray can respond.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.<\/span><\/p>\n<h1 style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong><span style=\"font-size: 24px; color: #000000;\">Health Matters<\/span><\/strong><\/h1>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">The surprise benefits of walking from the Harvard Medical School.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">This simple activity is now being touted as &#8220;the closest thing we have to a wonder drug,&#8221; in the words of Dr. Thomas Frieden, former director of the Centres for Disease Control and Prevention. You probably know that any physical activity, including walking, is a boon to your overall health. But walking in particular comes with a host of benefits. Here&#8217;s a list of five that may surprise you.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-99559\" src=\"https:\/\/websitedesigns.com.au\/elankanew\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/Health-Matters-e1663169300981.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"600\" height=\"402\" \/><\/p>\n<ol>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400; text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16px;\"><strong> It counteracts the effects of weight-promoting genes.<\/strong>Harvard researchers looked at 32 obesity-promoting genes in over 12,000 people to determine how much these genes actually contribute to body weight. They then discovered that, among the study participants who walked briskly for about an hour a day, the effects of those genes were cut in half.<\/span><span style=\"font-size: 16px;\"><strong>2. It helps tame a sweet tooth.<\/strong>A pair of studies from the University of Exeter found that a 15-minute walk can curb cravings for chocolate and even reduce the amount of chocolate you eat in stressful situations. And the latest research confirms that walking can reduce cravings and intake of a variety of sugary snacks.<\/span><span style=\"font-size: 16px;\"><strong>3. It reduces the risk of developing breast cancer.<\/strong>\u00a0Researchers already know that any kind of physical activity blunts the risk of breast cancer. But an American Cancer Society study that zeroed in on walking found that women who walked seven or more hours a week had a 14% lower risk of breast cancer than those who walked three hours or fewer per week. And walking provided this protection even for the women with breast cancer risk factors, such as being overweight or using supplemental hormones.<\/span>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 16px;\"><strong>4. It eases joint pain.<\/strong>\u00a0Several studies have found that walking reduces arthritis-related pain, and that walking five to six miles a week can even prevent arthritis from forming in the first place. Walking protects the joints \u2014 especially the knees and hips, which are most susceptible to osteoarthritis \u2014 by lubricating them and strengthening the muscles that support them.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 16px;\"><strong>5. It boosts immune function.<\/strong>\u00a0Walking can help protect you during cold and flu season. A study of over 1,000 men and women found that those who walked at least 20 minutes a day, at least 5 days a week, had 43% fewer sick days than those who exercised once a week or less. And if they did get sick, it was for a shorter duration, and their symptoms were milder.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong><span style=\"font-size: 20px; color: #000000;\">And Finally<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n<p style=\"font-weight: 400; text-align: center;\"><strong><span style=\"font-size: 20px; color: #000000;\"><em>All by &#8211; Phyllis Diller<\/em><\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">I admit, I have a tremendous sex drive.\u00a0 My boyfriend lives forty miles away.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age. As your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">\u00a0Housework can&#8217;t kill you, but why take a chance?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">\u00a0Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing up is like shoveling the sidewalk before it stops snowing.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-99560\" src=\"https:\/\/websitedesigns.com.au\/elankanew\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/Noel-News-6-e1663169453613.jpg\" alt=\"Noel News\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" \/><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">The reason women don&#8217;t play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">\u00a0Best way to get rid of kitchen odours:\u00a0 Eat out.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">A bachelor is a guy who never made the same mistake once.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">\u00a0I\u00a0want \u00a0my children to have all the things I couldn&#8217;t afford.\u00a0 Then I want to move in with them.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">\u00a0Most children threaten at times to run away from home.\u00a0 This is the only thing that keeps some parents going.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">\u00a0Any time three New Yorkers get into a cab without an argument, a bank has just been robbed.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">\u00a0We spend the first twelve months of our children&#8217;s lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve years telling them to sit down and shut up.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">\u00a0Burt Reynolds once asked me out.\u00a0 I was in his room.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">\u00a0What I don&#8217;t like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">\u00a0The only time I ever enjoyed ironing was the day I accidentally got gin in the steam iron.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">\u00a0His finest hour lasted a minute and a half.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">\u00a0My photographs don&#8217;t do me justice -they just look like me.<\/span><br \/>\n<span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">\u00a0<\/span><br \/>\n<span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">\u00a0Tranquillisers work only if you follow the advice on the bottle &#8211; keep away from children.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">\u00a0I asked the waiter, &#8216;Is this milk fresh?&#8217;\u00a0 He said, &#8216;Lady, three hours ago it was grass.&#8217;\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 16px; color: #000000;\">You know you&#8217;re old if they have discontinued your blood type.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-92307 alignleft\" src=\"https:\/\/websitedesigns.com.au\/elankanew\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/05\/Noel-Whittaker.jpg\" alt=\"Noel Whittaker\" width=\"300\" height=\"200\" \/><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16px;\">I hope you have enjoyed the latest edition of Noel News.<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16px;\">Thanks for all your kind comments. Please continue to send feedback through; it&#8217;s always appreciated and helps us to improve the newsletter.<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16px;\">And don&#8217;t forget you&#8217;ll get much more regular communications from me if you follow me on twitter &#8211; @NoelWhittaker.<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16px;\">Noel Whittaker<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Noel News\u00a0 Thousands of candles can be lighted from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened. Happiness never decreases by being shared. BUDDHA Welcome to another newsletter I started the last newsletter discussing interest rates and the rise of 50 basis points last Tuesday, taking the cash rate to [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":99485,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"aside","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[20],"tags":[47707,47708,18893],"class_list":{"0":"post-99484","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-aside","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-articles","8":"tag-health-matters","9":"tag-next-months-federal-budget","10":"tag-noel-whittaker","11":"post_format-post-format-aside"},"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v25.7.1 (Yoast SEO v25.9) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Noel News<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"I started the last newsletter discussing interest rates and the rise of 50 basis points last Tuesday, taking 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